Don't tell me you love me
I know you're ashamed of me
You hide me away like i'm a criminal
I should have never told you
You don't respect me
Or who I am
I'm sorry I'm not the perfect daughter you dreamed of
But you know what
Go Fuck Yourself
You're both shitty parents
Were you still a child if you never had a childhood?
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
The pain
It hurts so bad
As if someone has taken a brick
And dropped it on my chest
From twenty feet above
As if someone is holding my lungs
So tight in their hands
I'm losing air
As if a damn has been broken
And all the water is pouring out
Down my cheeks
My chin
My neck
Until they hit the sheets
And begin to disappear
But more follow soon after
I want to stop hurting
Friday, April 5, 2013
Drive
Teeth decaying
faster than
a bitter heart
falling
falling
falling
Hit the clouds
going 90
Slam the breaks,
turn up the radio
Listen to your parents'
advice on love
Realize life, love, humanity,
contradicts itself
faster than
a bitter heart
falling
falling
falling
Hit the clouds
going 90
Slam the breaks,
turn up the radio
Listen to your parents'
advice on love
Realize life, love, humanity,
contradicts itself
Spilled Ink
I never knew that
it was possible to feel
warmth in the darkest corners
of my soul. I did not
know that what I was
hiding in these shadowy places
was something I did not
believe I had or would be able to find.
Strength.
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
I should have loved you better
I'm still that clumsy 3 year old
tripping on my heels
crying when I fall down
I miss the innocence my brown eyes once whispered
and the soft touch of trust I felt on my skin
I had big cheeks
and hair like summer
and I would wait until my feet were rough enough to walk on the gravel path
and look both ways before crossing the street
I look back on those days with nostalgia
before I remember the yelling
and when I was only 6, wondering why I wasn't a kid anymore
I didn't feel like one, thats for sure
then I remember the sadness
and holding my teddy bear when we'd sit under the table whilst a war raged on
If I could do anything, anything at all
I'd take my 7 year old self and hug her 'till she stopped crying
I'd wipe away her tears and promise that she will be okay
you will love yourself someday
I haven't gotten there yet
but I know I love you
more than anything
I'd touch her scar free wrists,
and pray to god she'd never damage them
but most of all
I would tell her that I'm sorry
I should have loved you better
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